Discover 5 shocking things to do when a man pulls away in a relationship. Learn how to navigate this tricky situation with grace and resilience.
Personal relationships are complex and when romantic expectations come into play, it is possible to experience the confusion of not understanding the other person’s behavior. In certain situations, there is a risk of falling into the effect of mental blockage, going round and round in circles around an issue without finding a definitive answer.
Shocking Things to Do When a Man Pulls Away.
What to do when a man walks away from you? Why does a man walk away without saying anything? This is one of those situations that can cause you disappointment if the expectations you had placed on that person made you believe in a reciprocated interest.
Let’s look at some coping tools for this situation, to prevent it from affecting your mood too much and causing additional problems.
1. Evaluate the reasons: do not assume without foundation
When the subject suddenly stops being close, no longer writes, does not respond, does not call… the situation can lead to a series of assumptions that respond more to our emotionality than anything else.
We cannot justify distancing ourselves from someone on the grounds that we are not good enough for them. This is a harmful thought that we must recognize and change immediately.
It is best to remain calm and not fall into extreme hypotheses . When in doubt, what we should do is seek a clear response from this person, approaching him with the firm conviction of obtaining an accurate response to the situation.
If this is not possible, then it is time to respect the other person’s apparent motives, without assuming, and respect the distance. Remember that no one is indispensable for happiness .
2. Be firm in your decisions: opportunities have a limit
In some cases, especially when there is an emotional attachment component, it is common that you do not want to accept that the subject has moved away, and you are not consistent in your decisions to move away as well.
For example, if you have decided that the healthiest thing for you is not to give more than you receive and not to pursue the permanence of this man in your life, you must do so.
The more consistent you are and the longer you go without contacting that person, the closer you will be to getting over it , which is ideal. It is never good to leave our peace of mind in the hands of another person. If you depend too much on someone, it is an issue that you need to work on.
3. Prioritize yourself: your value as a person is not negotiable
After a forced separation, that is, when they have distanced themselves from us without giving us any explanation that would help us understand what has happened, it is quite common to tend to blame ourselves, thinking that the reason is because of our defects . These thoughts are a mistake.
Attributing the cause of the distancing to a possible “defect” of ours indicates that we are not giving ourselves the proper value as people.
We cannot justify distancing ourselves from someone on the grounds that we are not good enough for them. This is a harmful thought that we must recognize and change immediately.
4. Avoid forced replacements: One nail does not drive out another nail
Stubbornly trying to find someone else with whom you can forget the one who has left will not do you any good. In fact, you will only succeed in reducing your autonomy, which is counterproductive for you . The best thing to do is to take some time to be alone.
Find activities that will take your mind off of forced social contact and help you focus more on yourself. This will also help you meet people who have common interests with you, and build a friendship that isn’t based on commitment, but on sharing the enjoyment of a common hobby.
5. Do not generalize: all men are not the same
Emotions sometimes lead us to exaggerated or generalized thinking. When a man walks away without fully clarifying his motives, unconscious defense mechanisms arise that play tricks on us… For example, subjectively rationalizing that all men are the same, and that if one left you, all will.
Gender does not imply the way we understand relationships , those beliefs are only myths and old paradigms that we must leave behind.
The more rational we are and accept that things will not always turn out the way we want, the more we will stop looking for answers outside, and find them within ourselves.
6. Closing cycles: letting go is part of personal growth
When a stage has already completed its cycle, we must accept this situation and let go of what we once wanted. Let go of what accompanied us for a while in order to move forward and meet new people, live new experiences. Clinging to a person is not healthy , and even less so when they have voluntarily distanced themselves from us.
Closing a cycle means understanding that there have been good times and bad times, and that now all of that is part of our learning as a person, which allows us to mature emotionally so that we can then live new experiences from a new perspective.
What not to do when a man is pulling away
Knowing how to act when a man pulls away from you is just as important as knowing what not to do. Sometimes, it’s not easy to know exactly how to act in this type of situation. In that case, you can start by keeping in mind what you should avoid:
- Paralyzing your social life : staying at home watching the hours go by waiting for the phone to ring, stopping your friendship plans and commitments because of this attitude that increases your sadness, your feeling of failure and your pain.
- Believing that you have lost the love of your life : There are many different people in the world and although you may feel this way now, after some time has passed, you will look at the situation from a different perspective.
- Living pending on their social networks : knowing details of their present life does not allow you to close this stage because you are constantly in contact with aspects of their life, based on hypotheses that you make about their publications. This is a good time to break the online link.
- Distance yourself : The worst thing you can do when a man distances himself from you is to do the same to yourself. That is, sabotage your well-being through a negative attitude.
- Believing you can be their best friend : Trying to fool yourself into believing that you can be their best friend as if it won’t affect you negatively. Finding excuses to keep in touch.
- Nurturing resentment and bitterness towards that person : perhaps you too can remember a time in your life when you distanced yourself from someone you initially felt interested in. The desire for revenge is destructive in this type of situation, no matter how unfair you consider the suffering endured.